Dating Stories: The Spitfire Lady

I was in Chile. I meet this woman and she said, “Australia’s so dangerous with all its animals.”

I said, “Not really. The worst thing that lives near me are spitfires.”

She said, “What’s a spitfire?”

I said, “It’s a caterpillar that shoots venom.”

She said, “You have caterpillars that shoot venom?”

I said, “No. It’s really just a liquid that irritates. People say it burns them.”

She said, “You have caterpillars that burn you?”

I said, “No. It’s not a big deal unless there’s a pack of them.”

She said, “They roam in packs, firing burning venom at you, and they’re caterpillars?”

I said, “Yeah. It sounds worse than it is. I have a bunch that group on a tree at my house.”

She said, “You have death caterpillars outside your house?”

I was telling Mum. She said, “It’s a good thing you’re not Australia’s tourism ambassador.”

I said, “I didn’t mean to mislead her/”

Mum said, “You make it sound like they’re massive pythons carrying flame throwers and hunting humans in murder squads.”

I did realise this that at the time. I thought I’d be funny and say to my date, “Oh don’t worry. The caterpillars don’t kill anyone. A friend of mine lost an arm once, but that’s it. Have a look.” and I googled spitfire injuries on my phone showed her pictures from World War 2 plane crashes. I said, “A spitfire does this.”

My date didn’t want to pursue life in Australia after that. She decided staying in Chile with a guy who hunts spiders for a living would be safer. I guess she’s happy. So that’s good for her.

 

For more on spitfires read here: http://lepidoptera.butterflyhouse.com.au/faqs/spit.html

Advertisements

Think something? Then say something here...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s