I was sitting at the bar and a woman came up to order a drink. She had a French accent, so I thought, She’s from out of town. She might go out with me. She wouldn’t know any better.
So I summed up my Year 8 French and said, “Bonjour.”
She said, “Salut. Parles bien français?”
I wasn’t sure what she said, but I wanted to keep the conversation going, so I said “Oui.”
She said, “C’est magnifique de parler Français. Avez-vous là vécu?”
I took a guess and said, “Non.”
She seemed happy with this.
Mum wasn’t so happy. She said, “Why’d you learn French at school? It only increases the number of people who don’t want to speak to you.”
I said, “I didn’t really learn it, and it was just a class I had. It wasn’t something I wanted. I more subjected to it.”
Mum said, “I know how that feels.” Then she kept looking at me until I left the room.
The French woman got served and said, “J’adore la bière et pommes frites.”
I think the last part was “chips”.
The French woman seemed to be waiting for me to say something.
I looked at her.
I said, “Oui.”
She looked at me.
I said, “Non.”
She said, “Et toi parlez vous francais?”
I said, “Bonjour.”
She smiled, said “Au revoir”, took her drink and chips, and went back to her friends. Then she pointed at me, and all her friends laughed. So that’s good for them. A jolly time was had. That’s a happy ending.