What They Should Do… Badminton

WTSD Badminton 002
Published in The Sunday Age Sport, 10 June 2012

WTSD… is set the game of badminton alight. The sport is called bad-minton, that’s a negative, and furthermore it uses a shuttlecock, which is a really silly name. Changes need to be made.

Granted, it might be the “fastest racket sport in the world”, but that label only applies to the “cock” prior to its feathers producing drag. Effectively the game is only dangerous over short distances, like Gimli son of Gloin, and exciting modern sports need to be dangerous 24/7.

What they have to do it set the shuttlecock ablaze. Have it fly over the net leaving a trail of smoke. Then, douse each side of the court in kerosene and watch the participants scamper franticly.

Winning points becomes more a chance to avoid serious burns, and this would bring a “two men enter, one man leave” element to badminton. It would also make it great night time viewing.

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